Making the Grief Kit
The Grief Kit began with a moment that split my life in two.
When my dad died, I was 19.
And everything I thought I understood about the world stopped making sense.
I remember being surrounded by flowers. They arrived every day. They filled the house. They were meant to bring comfort. But slowly, they wilted. Petals fell. Water turned cloudy. And it felt like everything I touched died.
What no one told me was that grief does not arrive with instructions.
I did not know how to re-enter the world.
I did not know how to talk about what had happened.
I did not even know that grief was something you could process.
So I did what many people do. I kept going.
I learned how to function, but not how to grieve. I moved forward without language for what I was carrying, without tools, without permission to slow down. It took nearly a decade to understand that what I had never processed was still shaping how I lived, loved, and related to the world.
That realization is where the Grief Kit truly began.
There is no such thing as a one size fits all approach to grief.
Grief is deeply personal. No two losses are the same. The nervous system responds differently depending on who was lost, how the relationship functioned, and what else life is asking of you at the same time.
But grief is not rare.
It has been part of the human condition since the beginning. Every culture, every generation, every family has known it. What is missing is not grief itself, but support that reflects how complex it actually is.
The Grief Kit was created to meet that gap.
Not as a solution.
Not as a timeline.
But as a thoughtfully curated set of supports that you can engage with in your own way.
The thinking behind the kit
Grief affects more than emotions. It impacts memory, attention, the body, and a person’s sense of meaning. It can fragment thoughts, disrupt routines, and make even simple decisions feel overwhelming.
The Grief Kit was designed with this in mind.
Writing and reflection are included because grief often lives in fragments. Journaling helps the brain organize what feels scattered and gives shape to thoughts that otherwise loop endlessly. Prompts exist to reduce the effort it takes to begin, not to tell you what you should feel.
Tangible objects are included because grief is physical as much as it is emotional. Holding something meaningful can help regulate the nervous system and support what psychologists call continued bonds. The relationship does not end when someone dies. It changes. Acknowledging that can be stabilizing rather than harmful.
Symbolic actions matter because the brain understands change through experience, not explanation. Planting something, placing something, or tending to something with intention creates moments of acknowledgment that words often cannot. These small rituals help the body register that something has happened, even when the mind is still catching up.
Space for messiness matters because grief is not tidy. Tears, anger, numbness, and confusion often arrive without warning. Normalizing the physical reality of grief reduces shame and allows people to move through emotions rather than suppress them.
Gentle forward-facing prompts are included because grief does not disappear, but life continues. Learning how to live alongside loss requires small, manageable steps. Not moving on. Not letting go. Simply learning how to carry what remains in a way that leaves room for the rest of life.
Each element of the Grief Kit exists because it supports a different part of the grieving process. Together, they form a flexible system rather than a prescribed path.
What we hoped to create
The goal was never to create a kit that tells someone how to grieve.
The goal was to create something that acknowledges the reality of grief and offers support without pressure, judgment, or expectation.
Something you could return to.
Something you could set down.
Something that adapts to where you are, rather than asking you to adapt to it.
And finally, something that matters deeply to us.
You have permission to feel exactly as you do.
There is no correct timeline.
There is no wrong way through.
Grief is not a problem to solve.
It is love rewritten.
The Grief Kit exists to support that truth, and to make the chapters ahead feel a little lighter, a little more held, and a little less lonely.
That is the story behind it.